Yesterday my heart broke wide open. Actually it was more akin to a BURSTING of devastating proportions. As I sat down to watch a few minutes of sports coverage on television came the horrendous news that Washington State's sophomore quarterback, Tyler Hilinski, was found dead in his college dormitory. His apparent inner demons had caused him to take his own life with a self inflicted gunshot wound. He was just 21 years young..........
To the outside world, Tyler appeared to have an incredibly bright future ahead of him. After slowly impressing his coaching staff the previous two years he was named the starter for the Cougar's next season. Reports say he was a beacon of INSPIRATION and leadership to the entire student body on the Washington State campus. His CALLING to service extended to mentorship to players who sought his natural gifts and willingness to share his knowledge with others. And yet, as is too often the case, a special Spirit filled with extraordinary talent and a passion for being of service to others was obviously hiding his pain and suffering to all those in his TRIBE. And my soul feels ripped apart. For him, his family and friends, as well as the entire Washington State community.
And part of me is angry. You all know my motto; THE WORLD NEEDS MORE HEROES!!
Yet one was taken away from us- needlessly and tragically - yesterday. Sometimes even Heroes need support on their Journey. Tyler obviously needed help that he never received. And while I never met him, I am willing to go out on a not so long limb to believe it was because of a STIGMA toward mental illness. Did you know that suicide is the second case of death for men between the ages of 18-45. THE SECOND CAUSE OF DEATH.......
If that statistic doesn't rattle you to your core, I don't know what will encourage you to assist in creating a CALL TO ACTION!! No longer can we turn away to the devastating, needless pain and suffering of mental illness. The time has come for us to ask ourselves what action steps we can FINALLY take toward eradicating the misunderstood Myth that mental illness is some modern form of lepresy. Or that those individuals who are affected with this HORRIBLE dis-ease (and YES- it IS a Dis-ease) should somehow be treated any differently than someone afflicted with any other form of bodily illness! Because the hard truth is that we can NO LONGER afford to look the other way; too many lives are at stake!
Just two years ago, I was one of those individuals who could very easily become just another statistic. As I have disclosed in previous posts, I suffer from depression. And for those of you who have never been struck down by this absolutely insidious illness, let me share something with you. I have dealt with severe Crohn's dis-ease. So bad that I had to have my complete colon removed and wear a colostomy bag until a new surgical procedure was able to create an internal pouch for me. As a side effect of Crohn's disease, I was also afflicted with the most sever form of arthritis called Aynkylosis Spondylitis. It cause certain joints in your body to fuse in an ever so painful process. I have been able to overcome most of my illness and as I have stated in previous posts, I now consider them all tools of WISDOM!! But I do have a strong INTENTION for sharing my own maladies with you all. It is to shed the light of truth that my previous bouts of depression aren't even in the same league of utter despair, emotional, physical, and spiritual pain and suffering that befalls on me during a bout of DEPRESSION!! And I am willing to bet it has a very similar affect on the millions of others who suffer from this illness that creates a cloud that shields any sense of HOPE from your psyche.
And the manner in which it selects its victims has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH HOW MENTALLY OR PHYSICALLY STRONG YOU ARE- and I mean nothing!! But for so many of us who suffer from some sort of mental illness, we hide our pain in the darkness, all alone. For fear of judgment and alienation from those who love us the most. My Soul completely weeps to think that anyone would feel they have to face this horrendous dis-ease all alone. Because I know firsthand that if weren't for my own loving and caring support system, I would probably NOT be here typing this post today. Yeah.... take that in for a moment! And since I am aware that WE ARE ONE, I recognize that no life is more special than any other.
But, I still have an AMAZING sense of hope! Why- Because just like the current #ME TOO movement and the positive manner that it has caused a rapturous ripple effect that is slowly changing the manner that victims of sexual harassment and abuse can safely step forward and tell their story for the first time, I KNOW we have the same ability to replicate that sense of supportive LOVE to those of us who suffer with mental illness.
So I ask all us NEW AGE NERDS, as well as anyone else who will read today's post, to start a #DON'T JUDGE movement! And share it's meaning with anyone who inquires. On behalf of all of us who suffer with mental illness, it would go a LONG way toward continuing us on a fast track toward supporting millions of us to step back into the light and get the help so many desperately needs.............
Nerdmaste,
Jeffrey Louis Martinez
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